​There are some things that come easily and some things that don’t when it comes to motherhood.

Posted by Dawna Jensen on 8th Jan 2019

There are some things that come easily and some things that don’t when it comes to motherhood. 

Being a mom for me came easily the first time, i was elated and grateful for how quickly and easily it was for me to get it and to adapt to the changes it brought. However, everything that I loved about what was easy at first proved to be seemingly impossible as documented days turned in to discouraging weeks and months and then devastating years piled in one after the other. 

I realized, despite my first experience and the ease of answered prayers in that first year and with my first child, the opposite was debilitating. I was in constant (emotional) pain. My faith in the Lord’s timing helped me push through the pain and to see life as the one eternal round we’ve been taught about. I changed my views on life and put my trust in the Lord. I lived happily, we bought into a business, worked hard, relaxed on vacations, took our daughter on a Disney cruise, trusted in good things to come and did our best to stay strong amid such a difficult time in our lives. 

We did this as well as many interrogating procedures and fertility treatments, trainings in fostering to adopt children, hours of prayer & more rejection, we worked hard, served in the church and genuinely loved our lives knowing deep down that something (or I should say someone) was missing. 

We had said no to many situations that arose while we were on the fost to adopt list and with so many opportunities not meant to be ours and every one of them breaking my soul to say no, we chose not to renew our foster care/adoption license in 2014, our daughter was nearly in the double digits now and it just seemed fruitless to continue. It was a painful decision in my motherhood, we let go of a lot and let the Lord truly take over. 

At about this same time a baby boy was born about 2.5 hours away and unbeknownst to us, he was soon to be ours. I recorded a pretty special promise and priesthood blessing in my Leafy Treetops planner the month this sweet baby boy was born, it was a promise that all the years, prayers & tears for another child were about to be realized. I believed it but it didn’t make what was about to unfold any easier. 

A giant prayer in my car one day resulted in a phone call the next day. A phone call, that when it came and I heard the sounds of a very young baby in the background I knew right then and there, sight unseen, that those sounds were coming from my son. For the first time in almost 9 years I knew we were finally going to see the end of a long road and the beginning of another. 

Five months after the initial phone call and a rollercoaster of emotions, this beautiful 11 month old baby boy was placed in my arms, he matched the boy who was always in my heart. It was finally him in the flesh, not mine or my husbands but here he was mine in every spiritual and pre-planned perfectly orchestrated way, he was mine. His path, like ours, wasn’t easy. It was painful. But here we were reunited by an all knowing all loving God.

The day he was sealed ours for time and all eternity, he called me mommy, lunged in to my arms and like he knew the mortal difficulties that led to that moment and the sanctity of what was about to unfold in that sealing room, he looked in to my eyes as if to say thank you and erased a myriad of hurt and pain with the tightest most incredible out of this world hug around my neck with tiny strong arms, all this while my husband of 12 years kneeled across from us, our now 11 year old daughter behind him watching on and with angels, seen and unseen, surrounding us. 

It was an unforgettable moment, one that left an indelible impression on everyone there, no one more than me. I was a mother again, it didn’t come easily or quickly or pain free but it came and the words of an apostle of God {Jeffrey R Holland} that carried me through so much heartache came to my mind again, “Some blessings come soon, some come late and some don’t come until heaven but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come.”

This planner was one of my life savers —still is— the quotes & graphics & type of paper used throughout are one thing but the sections containing a monthly spread as well weekly with individual days laid out so perfectly to help me keep appointments straight, business demands and deadlines, work as an LDS seminary support specialist, kids schedules and church obligations all organized in my type A color coded way. 

I have rid myself of all other notebooks and journals and consolidated everything in to one place: this Mormon Mom Planner. I love keeping track of my spiritual life as well with scripture reading charts and the Living Christ and Family Proclamation, everything important to me is included in this planner and has been for each of the 5 awesome, but hardest years of my life. It’s one of my constants and I’m always in awe with it, the detail, the cuter than heck designs, everything!!!! 

Not one thing is missed by the creators and because of that I’m able to keep more things straight even in the midst of the crazy, the carefree and the hard and taxing times of my life. It’s literally everything and more that I set out to find 5 years ago now. Thank you for reading my mind when I searched google for the perfect planner five years ago now. You guys are amazing! Never stop making these planners, they’re the BEST!!